Easily, the physical distance from the JSL class has presented some challenges. What comes to mind is a Martin Buber text from Between Man and Man that Jenni sent me back in March: "We are to converse with one another and not at or past one another...There are no gifted and ungifted here, only those who give themselves and those who withhold themselves."
I haven't been able to physically face my colleagues and converse with them the last several months. It has not felt like the "I-thou" relationships I feel like I formed in the fall. That is, last semester I learned from my colleagues and I felt as though they also were learning from me. I developed tremendous respect for them, their views and the work they do in the Jewish community. It was not a utilitarian relationship. I got to know them as people also, not just for their resource potential. This semester I haven't had much contact with my fellow students. I miss the class time and discussions from the fall. I know I lost a lot of what is great about being part of a JSL cohort because I was not in the Bay Area. Still, being in touch with Jenni and Mara has made this experience a valuable one. I have continued to learn and make progress in this class because of their feedback, resources and reflection prompts.
I feel like I gave of myself this semester, but probably not to the extent that I could have had I physically been present in the class. The opportunities to give of myself are just different. I give of myself independently of others, whereas last semester I gave my thoughts and work to those around me. By writing on this blog, I hoped to give something of myself to others. I wonder if anyone has read this?
I know my fellow students have not withheld themselves, but I'm a little saddened that I have not seen or really heard anything concrete they have done this semester. Certainly via Jenny's emails I have been kept up-to-date on what topics are being discussed. I should have reached out to my fellow students, but I wasn't quite sure how best to do this. I would have loved to know more about their capstone projects, the session discussions, the teaching they have done this semester, ideas that came up, just generally their contributions and progress in the class. I know it will never be as if I were there, but I wonder how I could have been more in touch. I missed the connections we formed as a group last semester.
Everyone in this class is gifted. I guess the distance factor presented new challenges that I hope future distance learners can work to improve for themselves and for reaching their colleagues.
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Rachel - thank you for this candid reflection. You articulate many of the obstacles to "distance learning" and therefore many of the reasons why we have felt strongly that this class must be offered in person and for a local community.
ReplyDeleteThis semester was a learning process for you, me, and Mara and I know that she and I are grateful that you were willing to experiment with us. I, too, have felt the distance and the loss of interactions that comes with that. On several occasions your classmates mentioned to me how much they miss your contributions to class. Though, despite my repeated requests that the read and respond to your blog they have not done so...I think a reflection of people's busy schedules.
When you're back in June (yikes, really June 7th? so soon!!) it would be great to sit down and have a debrief of the "independent study" experience. I already have ideas of what I would or wouldn't do if we were in the situation to offer this option again and would love to think out loud with you about it. Likewise, I've enjoyed using the blog format with you and am thinking about using it for the regular class next year and would love to bounce ideas off of you for that.
In every learning opportunity presented to groups individuals walk away with different experiences. Often, the same aspect of the learning opportunity is experienced in opposite ways by different group participants. This is one of the challenges of pedagogy - finding something that will engage the maximum number of students in meaningful ways.
Though the community of practice element of your experience this semester suffered I hope you have not lost sight of the things you gained this semester that will enhance and deepen your work as a JSL professional, Jewish community leader, and human being. Peppered throughout your writing are references to things you've learned at Pardes - valuable l'gamrei! Likewise, the experiences you've had with the Peace Players, ICCI, etc will be shape your work with the program you're developing for your capstone (does it have a name yet?). I hope that these opportunities have added meaning to your sense of self as an educator and Jewish community professional and, specifically, your role as a leader in the field of JSL.
As always, I look forward to continuing this discussion with you!